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Home - Morsels - Humor

Death By DeSign
by Nancy Ness

How silly when considering
Directions taken lit'rally
From signs on doors. Interpreting
Could lend us mass insanity.

A visit to the hospital,
A shopping mall or grocery store -
Confuses my occipital,
Just heeding signs on ev'ry door.

This one says "In" and that one "Out"
I saw one sign that said "Third Floor."
And one "Revolving" - turned about
'Absurd' I thought - for that's a DOOR!'

While one says "Push" - the other "Pull"
We "Enter" here, - "No Entrance" there
"No Exit" - But our hands are full!
Perhaps we "Exit" by the "Stairs?"

"Automatic Doors, Beware" I see
Beware? - Do they attack sometimes?
And then there's "Personnel Only"
Of course, they're "Kept Closed at All Times"

"Electric Closet" - lights? not brooms?
"Employee's Lounge" - for coffee break?
And then, of course, the two "Restrooms"
But, how much resting can they take?

"The Nursing Station"!?! - Babes nursing?
The "Central Bath" - for all to share?
I see one that says "Housekeeping"
They keep a great big house in there? .... Geesh!!

"Utilities" - doors side by side
One sign says "Clean" the other "Soiled"
Why not just open both up wide?
The "Boiler Room" - where things are boiled?

The "Fire Doors" - which aren't aflame
And "Smoke Doors" - also clearly say
"No Smoking" here - the same door's claim;
Confusion reigns to my dismay.

I think that I would love to see
The manner chaos we'd suppose;
I just might laugh hysterically
If all those signs were juxtaposed!